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Liberal Jokes:
Anti-ALP Jokes


    Q: What is the difference between an intelligent ALP frontbencher and Bigfoot?
    A: Bigfoot has been spotted.


    Q: What is the difference between a bleeding heart left winger and a puppy?
    A: A puppy stops whining after it grows up.


    Q: How many ALP MPs does it take to change a lightbulb?
    A: It's irrelevant; they still don't know they're in the dark!


    Q: How many ALP MPs does it take to change a lightbulb? A: They cannot do it. They are too busy changing their own policies on the run.


    They say that Captain James Cook was the first ALP member. When he left to discover Australia, he didn't know where he was going. When he got there he didn't know where he was. And it was all done on a government grant.


    For three years, the young ALP member took his vacations at a country Motel. He had an affair with the Motel owner's daughter. Looking forward to an exciting few days, he dragged his suitcase up the stairs of the motel, then stopped short. There sat his lover with an infant on her lap! "Why didn't you write when you learned you were pregnant?" he cried. "I would have rushed up here, we could have gotten married, and the child would have my name!" "Well," she said, "when my parents found out about my condition, we sat up all night talkin' and talkin' and we finally decided it would be better to have a bastard in the family than a Laborite."


    There was a dance teacher who talked of a very old dance called the ALP Dance. "All you have to do" she told her class "is take three steps forward, two steps backward, then side-step side-step and turn around."


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Written and Authorised by A.Molloy, PO Box 669, Double Bay, 2028.
Responsibility for Election Commentary taken by A.Molloy, PO Box 669, Double Bay, 2028.
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